Something missing?
First, thank you all so much for continuing to read my new blog and updating your blogrolls and google readers! Also, hello to any new readers out there, if I haven’t already, I will be stopping by your blog soon! Don’t forget to enter my giveaways–you could win some yummy bars and honey, a book or a date night!
Yesterday morning I went into my internship late. They are very flexible with hours there and to them, lifestyle comes first! Awesome. So, I went for a nice 6-miler along the river and then did an hour-long yoga class before going into work at 11!
At the end of the yoga practice, we were all laying in shavasana and meditating and I couldn’t help feeling that something was missing from my life. Then, I gave my head a hard shake, right there in yoga class.
Four months ago I was SO stressed that if you would have asked me what it would take to de-stress me, I would have said for Eric to get into welding school and for me to find a paid, internship in Kamloops.
Done.
Now, I’m constantly thinking about whether Eric will be able to find a job in September, and what I’m going to do after I graduate next spring–will I start work right away or do some travelling?
I need to stop that. Something is NOT missing from my life, just in my mind.
Life is good right now. Really good. I’m in the best shape of my life and feel great about my body, I love my internship and they’ve offered me a paid, part-time position to stay on for the summer, things with Eric are good, the weather is beautiful, every night I go to bed with a smile on my face.
But, despite all of that, for the last few weeks I’ve been walking around feeling like something is missing. Here’s what’s missing–drama, stress, anxiety. If there isn’t drama, stress and anxiety in my life, I go looking for it.
No more.
Today, I’m taking a pledge to live in and be happy in the moment, for the rest of the summer (and preferably the rest of my life). I’m missing out on the NOW because I’m constantly worrying about the future! That needs to stop!
This weekend, Eric and I are going camping. I’m going to lay in the sun (with sunscreen on of course, just because I’m appreciating life doesn’t mean I’m asking for skin cancer) and read my book. I’m going to take naps. I’m going to relax. I’m not going to think about work or worry about how full my google reader will be when I get back.
When I want to eat ice cream. I’m going to eat ice cream. I’m not going to stress anymore over how many calories are in something or how many miles I will have to run to burn it off.
I’m going to stop eating when I’m full. I’m not going to stuff myself anymore, if I want something I will eat it, and then I will stop. No more bingeing.
I’m going to keep running because I love it more every day. But, when my knee hurts or I’m out of breath or I just want to enjoy the view, I’m going to walk. I can still be a “runner” even if I take walking breaks.
Yes, I’m going to live in the moment from now on! Want to join me?
I’d love to! I need to spend more time living in the moment and enjoying life, without worrying so much about random things.
Have fun camping!
i think once i learn how to do that, boyfriend will be so happy with me. i’ll work towards that goal alongside you!
I hear you on seeking out things that are anxiety inducing. I’ve been told by my husband that, at times, I’m addicted to worrying. In the last little while I’ve been trying to live more in the present moment, so I’m right there with you!
I’m definitely joining you! What a great post. I tend to do the same thing when things are going well. It’s almost like I get suspicious of the good luck and am waiting for something bad to happen. It’s a terrible way to act and think, but I definitely think it’s a woman thing. Many times I wish I could have the more laid back, carefree attitude of guys!
Regardless of all that, I’m definitely joining you! Live in the now!
That’s what everyone should do – live in the now…not a lot of us do that, and most of us may not realize that living in the now, and not worrying about the future may help us in the long run. Have fun camping! And I do wish you well with your “live in the now” plan
I agree with you completely! it’s not always easy to live in the now because like you said we all worry entirely too much but we should live HERE and NOW because it’s all we have.
I will try to do this with you as well.
Ice cream sounds amazingly delicious right now. I’ve been craving it big time.
Life is what happens while we’re making plans for what’s supposed to happen next.
carpe diem! have a great weekend **hugs**
yes yes YES! I love this post. I am so like that, always stressing my self out for no reason. Sometimes, there’s lots of reasons for me to be stressed and other times, I just dwell on things. Get all “negative Nancy.” ha! but you’re right, it needs to stop! I loved when you said you gave your head a hard shake. I do that too when I am thinking about something and I realize I am being ridiculous and I just scream NO in my head!
anyway, it’s good to realize when your life is good, to be thankful for the things you have. I know too often I take things for granted. So I am going to try to live in the moment with you.
Have a fabulous weekend camping with Eric!
holy crap. this is my life right now too! there always seems to be at least a little bit of stress and anxiety, but for me that is normal. but still, im happy as can be and so proud to be where im at in life. isn’t it a great feeling? congrats on getting to this point in life! and yes, I will join you!
Yes I need to start living in the moment more for sure! Thats so cool that your hours are flexible so you can get some sweet exercise in before work.
Awesome! I love it!
Do it! That sounds great Amber. I know exactly how you feel and I totally support you! You can do it, sometimes you just have to stop and think.
Also, how do I get another little face to appear when I post comments? This little guy looks mean. Ekk!
This is a great blog today! Ambular, You are not missing anything in your life! You have so many fabulous things going for you! Your going to have such a great summer STRESS FREE!!!
You can just live vicariously though my Jerry Springer style life! It should be calming down soon, I think the brunt of it is over!
XOXO
I am joining you and living in the moment from now on!
You have made your mother so happy!!! Love You.
Yaaay! I love the insights that come while in savasana!
Have fun camping this weekend!
H =)
Love it! Consider yourself joined…by ME!
Camping is the best thing ever.
Woah, beautiful post! I totally know what you mean because I am in the same place as you are (or were
). I don’t know if I’m ready to stop though, because when I stop stressing about things, I just completely stop thinking about them. And with job hunting, this isn’t good, because then I purposefully miss deadlines…
Anyways, I hope you have an amazing time camping!!!! I’m completely jealous
Oh, and if you haven’t already you should read Eat,Pray,Love (can’t remember if you said you read it) and The TIme Traveller’s Wife! 
I’m totally in! What a great post…
*laughs* I love your sunscreen comment!!! If people want to go an bake in the sun, that is FIIIIIIINE with me…though I HATE when people comment on how pale I am…I do not enjoy the idea of getting skin cancer!!
Anyway, that is not the point of this post is it???
I used to be a TERRIBLE procrastinator – I would leave things until the last minute ALL the time, just because I was an adrenaline junkie…anyway, that was a stress I really didn’t need to add to my life…so I did what you said, starting living for now.
I am not EXACTLY happy but that’s because I have things I want to change…but those are coming along slowly…
I think this was a GREAT post Amber!!
HAVE FUN CAMPING!!!!
I love camping, and I haven’t been in forever! I hope you have a great time this weekend for me!
Thanks for the wishes! The race was tough but great, can’t wait to get out there again!
Your post is awesome, it is always nice to get a fresh start! Good luck with that! Oh, and maybe I am just blonde, but were is the link to follow your blog…
Woops! That comment above is from me Leah (Counting down) haha
Good call, it’s always good to step away take a breath and focus on the positive
Btw, I found your blog through Kylaroma and not to sound creepy but I’m a fellow redhead , yoga lovin blogger living in Kamloops who completed the B-Journ program a couple years ago with a redheaded cat. Blogger twins, perhaps? Loving your blog!
I am SO guilty of this. I could have written this post myself. This is something I am vowing to work on as well!!
I totally used to do that whole “something is missing from my life” thing as well. I had that feeling a lot last summer, until I started going to church and volunteering. I learned that even though things were doing really well in my life, I needed something BIG to be working on, some project that made me feel really good about myself. For me, those things were strengthening my faith and helping others. And it worked- I don’t feel like I’m missing a big chunk of something any more.
Relaxing and trying to absorb all that life has to offer helps a lot too. Good luck with that Amber!
~Amanda
Wow! That internship sounds amazing! So cool you were able to come in late — and that you went for a run and yoga! Kudos to you! Yeah, I hear ya, I’m so bad at over analyzing life rather than living in the moment … always thinking about what’s coming up next or what’s on my to-do list or etc. etc.
I think everything is going to work out just perfect for you and Eric! Eric will find a job — and you will too! Unless you want to travel first. It will all work out just the way it’s supposed to.
Yay for eating ice cream without counting calories!
Now, if I could only figure out how to stop eating when I’m full. Ugh, such a problem of mine! eeeee. Reminds me of the comedian Jim Gaffigan. Hee. You should check his stuff out – hilarious!
Um, this is the longest comment ever but I just wanted to also add that I like your idea of being a runner – it’s AOK to stop and appreciate the view/walk for a bit!